I was all set to post today about my surprise upon discovering I'm featured in an Etsy Treasury; and then I was just going to ramble on about 'nothing'. But then I was reading something on the internet and had a flash of awareness.....which we'll get to in a minute.
First the treasury - yay! Purple is my favorite color - though green is quickly encroaching on purple's #1 status....So this treasury made me smile - big! It was curated by a member of BEST . :) Check out BEST: http://www.baltimorecraft.com/
SO happy to be included!
Moving on to my internet experience - so I have been confronted lately with a recurrent sort of theme - reading about people who are living 'counter culturally'.
Those who have decided to shuck 4 year degrees and/or conventional lifestyles in one way or another. . . . and some of them are downright cool, but all of them seem to have this 'liberating' quality about them. AND, they are making it work! My initial thought is always, 'wow', 'cool', 'looks like they are so happy', 'looks like fun'...........and then right behind that comes...
" I can't........"
"I can't 'thus and such'"
and then I had a sudden awareness of how I often I say "I can't". I think I am going ot BAN those words from my vocabulary. They stink!
Now, I am a big proponent of learning to say 'no'. Or even - "I won't".
Some people have a hard time saying 'no' but I have learned that it is essential. And I really do know how to say 'no' now - without added qualifiers, excuses, or ancillary comments. "No" can stand alone. No is no.
And "I won't" is great too - I won't allow this or that or I won't stand for this or that....etc.
But - "I can't" ..... hmmmmm, I don't like it so much. Its so.....umm,powerless?
Maybe that is what I don't like about it. It seems to be full of a sense of powerlessness. What happened to the days of "I can do anything!" ??
Can I do anything? (could I ever???)
I am speaking apart from the idea of "all things are permissable though not beneficial" as in 1 Corinthians 10:23 -- certainly I'm not debating that.
I'm speaking of ability, abandon, drive, devotion, freedom......TRYING.
I'm thinking of norms, expectations, responsibilities, committments....DARING.
Can I do anything? Am I able to make a radical change in my life if I so chose? Would I choose it? What holds me back?
Is it that I can't...........or that I won't?
And what about things that aren't radical? What about more commonly acceptable changes - little dreams - is it that I can't? Or that I "don't"...or that I "won't"? And what holds me back?
Do you ever wonder about these things?
Are you living your dream? If not, what parts are missing?
What would need to be different?
Why not make some changes?
WHAT IS HOLDING YOU BACK?
Lately I am wondering.
Addendum - before I hit post, I got lost in another endeavor and I got to thinking about dreams and life -- and Randy Paush came to mind. I haven't thought about him in quite a while. I never met the man, but he tends to leave an indelible mark on one's memory. He lived a rather conventional life but he lived it with an unconventional passion. He lived his dream in many ways - he took chances and was unperturbed by hearing 'no'.
I want to be more like that. :)