Friday, October 26, 2012

And you thought your day was bad (or) don't wind up in a ditch

Yesterday began with me arriving at work (well, ok, it began way before that at home, but that part was largely uneventful - or so I thought)

Anyway, when I arrived at work  - I parked, grabbed my cell phone, and turned to grab my purse. And lo and behold - there was no purse. Not on the seat next to me where it usually enjoys the morning ride. Not on the floor where it sometimes rides when there are more bags. not in the back where it sometimes gets tossed when I'm late and hands are full.

Nope, it was no where.


So off into work I go wondering WHERE my head was when I left the house. I mean, yes, it was still attached, but one would begin to wonder.

As I was going about my business at work, I realized at some point that my hands were bare.
As were my ears.

NAKED I tell you! That is SO highly unusual. I pretty much ALWAYS wear at least one ring - and two earrings. ;-)  But not today. Today I had none. Zip. Zero. Zilch.


There was one other thing right before I left work, hmmm, how to put it delicately - ummm, you girls know. And this was the second time this month so it was a bit of a surprise.

And the surprises keep coming.

I arrive home, it's a typical Tuesday night I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like....

wait, sorry life, story, song morph. (anyone have a song stuck in their head now? you're welcome)

I make dinner, help with the babies. . . . and while I'm playing trucks on the floor with maniacal baby. He head butts me. Which is not all that unusual. What is unusual is that a rather large marble appeared on my eyebrow. It was like maaaaaaaaaaaagic.

Painful magic. 

I think my kids were actually freaked out. I'm like hey - they baby head butted me, is it bad? Is it bad? And you know how your kids are never impressed by anything and just kind of give a sideways glance cuz they can hardly take their eyes off their ipods or themselves in the mirror?

yea, it was like that.

Except when each one, in turn, whipped their head around to do a double-take, I knew I had something pretty interesting going on.

The exchange continued something like this - Lemme see. whoa. ok. ow, its big. ewww, it's hard. hey touch it, it's hard. uh-uh. touch it. no! touch it. no! TOUCH IT!  ow. well you said touch it.

So the marble dissipated over the course of an hour or two and as it started to go down,
 more magic.

Wonderful lovely pretty colors began to appear.

This was right before bed.

This greeted me in the morning.

More magic, right? If only Halloween were THIS weekend!

So I ignored the headache, washed up, and slapped on some make-up
(and yes, I totally should have found some colors to make the other eye match, but I don't think I own anything that bold anymore. I'm a GRANDMA after all!)

And when I open my eyes, well, you can hardly tell, right?


 However, the lighting at work isn't quite as friendly.....

I think my co-workers just think I put my make up on in the pitch dark (which may be the case next week if we lose power from some super-storm headed our way)

Funny, this whole exchange reminded me of those TV commercials - don't know what they are for - but  you know the ones where they say, don't take up racquetball 'cuz you'll get hit in the face and wear an eyepatch. when you wear an eye patch people think you're tough. when people think your tough they want to see just how tough. when people want to see how tough you are, you wind up in a ditch. Don't wind up in a ditch.

except in my case it would be - don't play trucks with a baby....etc etc.

So here's me saying.

 I'm not tough. (obviously. a 15 month old gave me a black eye and I didn't even hit back!)

and I don't want to end up in a ditch.


and thank you.